i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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