I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
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I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
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Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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