What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
