gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
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You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
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And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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