he shaved USA in his pubs
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
