are you so shy because you have an std?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
