tonight lets celebrate not being married
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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