and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
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I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.