fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize