Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
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We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
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You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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