she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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