Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cat food counts as protein by the way
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize