Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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