peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
