thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize