and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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