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Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Please don't give away my fajitas
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