we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
