I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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