ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
