Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
I can feel your judgement through the phone
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing