He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
