some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I want to be your penis for a week.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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