We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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