I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
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friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
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Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
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