I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
