either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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