Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
