jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
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