I'm really into asian looking animals
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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