Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
