Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
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