ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?