She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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