Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(925): View more from California

Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?

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(440): View more from Ohio

vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?

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(314): View more from Missouri

I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment

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(406): View more from Montana

We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(919): View more from North Carolina

Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.

(1-860): View more from Connecticut

Fair enough.

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(702): View more from Nevada

listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on

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(361): View more from Texas

I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong

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