She's JV to your varsity
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize