Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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