Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
