My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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