yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
