im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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