That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
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First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
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He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text