she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.