I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Even my vagina gasped.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried