And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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