yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
