I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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