I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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