No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
