We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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