your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family