i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
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Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
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Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.